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Main Page Site Index Getting Pregnant Pregnancy Parenting Pregnancy and Parenting Journals Fertility Nutrition Pregnant Moms Morning Sickness Women's Health Child Health	Helping Your Older Child Cope when Moving to a New Town A mother of four once talked to me regarding her husband's job promotion and consequent relocation. The family was moving, in two months, to another state and their 15-year-old daughter was angry and depressed due to the pending loss of her friends. Her elementary-aged children seemed to be taking the relocation in stride. Of the 6 million youngsters who endure family re-locations each year, teenagers feel more anger and depression than younger children. They must agonize the loss of deeper relationships formed outside the family, and may resent parents for exerting such control over their lives. To make re-locating go smoother, tell your teenager that you’re available to discuss her concerns and to brainstorm possible solutions. Recommend that she plan a going-away party with her closest friends. Saying "Goodbye!" is not easy, but after the moving van unloads the last 15 years of her life into your new home in a distant city, she may always regret not openly hugging, sharing tears, and exchanging addresses with yesteryear’s friends. This woman's daughter has the opportunity to expand her world by exploring new horizons. She may write ahead to her new house of worship, hospital, Chamber of Commerce, tourist bureau, school officials, and local newspaper editor. From these key sources, the mom and her daughter will learn about the pulse of their new community: local controversies; what teens do for fun; what local museums, libraries, and city sport leagues have to offer; dates of local festivities, events and celebrations; the city’s heritage; volunteer opportunities; etc. Most of all, the daughter will learn people are obliging to strangers who bring goodwill. Their plight reminds me of a story about a wise and very friendly old man who hung out along a dirt road on the outskirts of his village. He always asked newcomers, "What was your old town like?" One newcomer replied, “Full of great, loving people!” The old man said, “You’ll find the same here!” Another answered, “My old town was a terrible, gossipy place!” The old man paused, then said to him...”You’ll find the same here.” Robert Morton, M.Ed., Ed.S. writes a familiy-oriented newspaper column, and is a father, practicing school psychologist, and instructor in the College Of Education at Bowling Green State University.