As a pregnant woman or husband whose wife is expecting, you may have found yourself thinking more about circumcision than you had ever done before. Most likely, you have been inundated with the advice of well-meaning family members and friends about their views on the practice, or even been faced with the teachings of your church or synagogue in relation to circumcision. It can be extremely difficult to come to an objective decision with societal, family, and religious pressure pulling you in different directions.

In the United States, we are led to believe that “everyone” chooses to circumcise their children as newborns. However, while this may have been true in the past (especially in the late 1960s when circumcision rates were as high as 80%), the times are certainly changing- statistics show that there are a significant number of uncircumcised males, probably as high as 40% of the total population. In addition, many of the people who are bending your ear one way or the other on the issue of circumcision are probably grossly misinformed themselves.

Most importantly, remember that a decision to circumcise your child is an extremely personal one, and many factors can influence your choice. Many people find it helpful to seek the advice of a close friend who has been pregnant with a male child, or ask their rabbi or preacher for direction on the issue. Others prefer to research circumcision on their own, visiting their local library or surfing the Internet for detailed information on the practice. It is also a good idea to bring any concerns or questions to your obstetrician, who has no doubt performed circumcision on hundreds of babies over the years and can provide extensive reading material to help you in your decision.

One of the best ways to respond to unsolicited advice on circumcision is to thank the person for sharing their own experience, but politely say that you and your significant other have already reached a decision on whether or not to circumcise and prefer that it be kept a private family matter. Many women (and men) try to mistakenly deflect attention on the subject by claiming that they have not yet made up their minds one way or the other- this approach only gives the person more incentive to convince you that their view is right.

Regardless of your decision, you should not feel ashamed in choosing to have your son circumcised or left intact. This is only the first of many hard decisions you will have to make as a mother, and you need to keep the best interest of your child at the forefront of your decision.

Posted in Circumcision

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